Questions I'm often asked about Counselling

How do I know if I need counselling?

Most people can work through problems in their own way, by confiding in friends or family, or by working things out for themselves.  We all have our own ways of making sense of life's difficult times, and often have developed good ways to deal with problems and can work our way out of them.  Its when the usual ways of dealing with difficult situations or emotions don't seem to be helping that counselling can be useful.  Some problems are more difficult to share with people close to us, because of embarrassment, shame or other confused feelings.  Sometimes the difficulties involve those closest to us, making it less straightforward to confide in them, sometimes it just feels like no-one else could possibly understand things from your side.  If you're feeling stuck, or lost in your problems, or in a crisis which has overwhelmed your usual ability to cope, counselling can offer a safe, non-judgemental space to share what is happening, and to have another person actively involved in understanding and seeking solutions with you.  A counsellor can bring a fresh perspective and  knowledge, skills and experience which can assist you in making sense of your issue.

What can I expect to happen in a counselling session with you?

Each person's counselling experience is different, as individuals bring their own unique experiences and viewpoints to the sessions. With me, you can  expect to be offered a safe space, lasting for an hour each time, in which we can talk about what matters to you, and where any trouble lies.  The time includes some space at the end to allow discussion and planning of future arrangements.  The approach I use is a blend of several ways of working , and will vary according to your way of expressing and dealing with your problems and emotions.  It is vital for you to feel able to freely express yourself - something that is not easy or always acceptable in everyday life.  This can take time.  I will generally check with you at each session whether you are feeling comfortable with what is happening in our sessions.   This will usually lead us to a clearer understanding of what you are going through and recognition and planning for ways forward.

Where does the session take place?

I work in Glasgow, or my own home.  It is possible in special circumstances for me to work with you in your home, following discussion of the reasons. Telephone, Skype/Facetime or email work is also possible, if this is comfortable and feasible.  It is also possible to 'walk and talk' - for some people being in the open air, and on the move is the most comfortable way to work.  Discussing what feels best for you will be part of the first session.

How long will I have to come for counselling?

It is difficult to be precise about the time it will take each person to reach a point where they feel as if they have reached an ending.  In some cases it can take only one or two sessions to help clarify important points, in others more time will be needed to explore the issues in depth.  Much depends on the way in which you usually work through problems, and the nature of the problems.  

How often will I attend counselling?

This is a matter for discussion between us.  It is common practice for people to attend weekly to start, but this is not a requirement, and may not be necessary or suit your situation.  Once you have decided you want to go ahead, this is one area for consideration when working out what you want from counselling, and while I'm happy to advise you, the final decision will always be yours.

How do I know if you will be the right counsellor for me?

I would strongly advise trying out sessions/phone calls with a few counsellors before making a final decision.  Many counsellors will offer some time either at a reduced rate or free, to help you to experience what it feels like to work with them.  There is no way of knowing for sure if someone is the right counsellor until you become engaged with the work, but trust your own feelings as they are generally a good guide to whether you will be able to work with the counsellor you choose.

Will anyone else ever know what Im speaking about in counselling?

What you talk about is confidential and will only be discussed outside of the session for two reasons.
The first reason would be if I had a concern about your well-being that would lead me to think you may be a risk to yourself or other people.  I will ask you at the first session for your GP and any other emergency contact numbers for use in a situation like that.
The second would be as part of the supervision of my own practice where I am required to discuss my work with an external practitioner.  This is to oversee my work and ensure I work  in appropriate ways.  No details such as your name or address would be used in this situation, so that you would effectively remain anonymous to the supervising practitioner.

Will counselling definitely work for me?

Its not possible to say that counselling will be the right way for every person to resolve their issues.  For some people it is highly effective, while others do not experience this to the same extent.  A lot depends on finding the right person to work with and on your own way of working through problems in your life.  Many people find that counselling is most beneficial as a way of identifying and clarifying difficulties to an extent that their own skills and knowledge can then give them the needed confidence and direction to  move forward.

Life is the sum of all your choices.
Albert Camus